Gone Girl - Book Club Discussion Questions

Gone Girl - Book Club Discussion Questions by Gillian Flynn was one of the big suspense novels of 2012. But far from just being a mindless thriller, Gone Girl is a literary page turner that is smart and witty. These book club discussion questions will help your reading group explore the plot, themes and ideas raised in the novel. Spoiler Warning: These questions contain important details about Gone Girl. Finish the book before reading on. In the first third of the book, did you think Nick was guilty? Why or why not?In the second part of the book, once you know the truth, what did you think was going to happen with Nick and Amy?Do you think someone could actually plan every detail of a set up or murder as perfectly as Amy did?What did you expect to happen after Amy returned? Were you surprised by her final precaution? Do you think that would truly be enough to get Nick to stay?Early on in the book, Amy writes in her diary: Because isnt that the point of every relationship: to be known by someone else, to be understood? (29).Toward the end of the book, on the night of Amys return, when she is making the case for going forward together, here is what she says and Nick thinks:Think about it, Nick, we know each other. Better than anyone in the world now.It was true that Id had this feeling too, in the past month, when I wasnt wishing Amy harm. It would come to me at strange momentsin the middle of the night, up to take a pi ss, or in the morning pouring a bowl of cerealId detect a nib of admiration, and more than that, fondness for my wife, right in the middle of me, right in the gut. To know exactly what I wanted to hear in those notes, to woo me back to her, even to predict all my wrong moves...the woman knew me cold...All this time Id thought we were strangers, and it turned out we knew each other intuitively, in our bones, in our blood (385).To what extent do you think the desire to be understood drives relationships? Do you understand how this could be appealing to Nick despite everything else? Nick stops strangling Amy and thinks, Who would I be without Amy to react to? Because she was right: As a man, I had been my most impressive when I loved her and I was my next best self when I hated her...I couldnt return to an average life (396).Is this believable? Is it possible for Nick to be more fulfilled in an extraordinary relationship where he is understood even if it is manipulative an dangerous?Nick once muses, It seemed to me that there was nothing new to be discovered ever again...We were the first human beings who would never see anything for the first time. We stare at the wonders of the world, dull-eyed, underwhelmed. Mona Lisa, the Pyramids, the Empire State Building. Jungle animals on attack, ancient icebergs collapsing, volcanoes erupting. I cant recall a single amazing thing I have seen firsthand that I didnt immediately reference to a movie or TV show...Ive literally seen it all, and the worst thing, the thing that makes me want to blow my brains out, is: The sec ondhand experience is always better. The image is crisper, the view keener, the camera angle and soundtrack manipulate my emotions in a way reality cant anymore (72).Do you think this observation is true about our generation? How do you think this affects relationships? How does it affect the way we live? Nick writes,I got secretly furious, spent ten minutes just winding myself up because at this point of our marriage, I was so used to being angry with her, it felt almost enjoyable, like gnawing on a cuticle: You know you should stop, that it doesnt really feel as good as you think, but you cant quit grinding away (107).Have you experienced this dynamic? Why do you think it feels good to be angry sometimes?At one point, Amy quotes the advice Fake it until you make it. Later, Nick writes, We pretend to be in love, and we do the things we like to do when were in love, and it feels almost like love sometimes, because we are so perfectly putting ourselves through the paces (404).Generally speaking, do you think this is good marriage advice? Do Nick and Amy disprove this advice?Rate Gone Girl on a scale of 1 to 5.

Quotations on Mothers and Motherhood

Quotations on Mothers and Motherhood Some quotes from notable women on motherhood, mothering, mothers, family, and children. Some are serious, some more light-hearted. All shed some light on attitudes towards women and mothers.   Quotes On Mothers and Motherhood A printed card means nothing except that you are too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone in the world. And candy! You take a box to Mother - and then eat most of it yourself. A pretty sentiment. Anna Jarvis, promoter of the establishment of Mothers DayArise then, women of this day! Arise, all women who have hearts! ... We, the women of one country, will be too tender of those of another country to allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs.... [ more] Julia Ward Howe, promoter of a Mothers Day for PeaceNo one who traces the history of motherhood, of the home, of child-rearing practices will ever assume the eternal permanence of our own way of institutionalizing them. Jessie BernardTo nourish children and raise them against odds is any time, any place, more valuable than to fix bolts in cars or design nuclear weapons. Marilyn FrenchWomens rights in essence is really a movement for freedom, a movement for equality, for the dignity of all women, for t hose who work outside the home and those who dedicate themselves with more altruism than any profession I know to being wives and mothers, cooks and chauffeurs, and child psychologists and loving human beings. Jill Ruckelshaus The phrase working mother is redundant. Jane SellmanNo woman can call herself free until she can choose consciously whether she will or will not be a mother. Margaret SangerMotherhood is neither a duty nor a privilege, but simply the way that humanity can satisfy the desire for physical immortality and triumph over the fear of death. Rebecca WestMy mother could make anybody feel guilty she used to get letters of apology from people she didnt even know. Joan RiversThe best way to keep children home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant and let the air out of the tires. Dorothy ParkerA wise parent humors the desire for independent action, so as to become the friend and advisor when his absolute rule shall cease. Elizabeth GaskellSo when the great word Mother! rang once more,I saw at last its meaning and its place;Not the blind passion of the brooding past,But Mother the Worlds Mother come at last,To love as she had never loved before To feed and guard and teach the human ra ce. Charlotte Perkins Gilman No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. Florida Scott-MaxwellSometimes when I look at all my children, I say to myself, Lillian, you should have stayed a virgin. Lillian Carter, at the 1980 Democratic Convention, where her son was nominated for a second term as US PresidentA mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. Tenneva JordanIts come at last, she thought, the time when you can no longer stand between your children and heartache. Betty SmithMama exhorted her children at every opportunity to jump at de sun. We might not land on the sun, but at least we would get off the ground. Zora Neale HurstonAt work, you think of the children you have left at home. At home, you think of the work youve left unfinished. Such a struggle is unleashed within yourself. Your heart is rent. Golda MeirAnd so our mothers and grandmothers have, more often than not anonymously, handed on the creative spark, the seed of the flower they themselves never hoped to see or like a sealed letter they could not plainly read. Alice Walker Motherhood is the strangest thing; it can be like being ones own Trojan horse. Rebecca WestBut kids dont stay with you if you do it right. Its the one job where, the better you are, the more surely you wont be needed in the long run. Barbara KingsolverTake motherhood: nobody ever thought of putting it on a moral pedestal until some brash feminists pointed out, about a century ago, that the pay is lousy and the career ladder nonexistent. Barbara EhrenreichWhy do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy the mother. Claudette ColbertThere was never a great man who had not a great mother it is hardly an exaggeration. Olive SchreinerA mothers arms are more comforting than anyone elses. Diana, Princess of WalesMotherhood: The most exhausting, emotional, rewarding and life-enhancing journey a woman can take. Charlotte PearsonBy and large, mothers and housewives are the only workers who do not have regular time off. They are the great vacationless cl ass.   Anne Morrow Lindbergh Whenever Im with my mother, I feel as though I have to spend the whole time avoiding land mines. Amy Tan, in  The Kitchen Gods WifeWomen do not have to sacrifice personhood if they are mothers. They do not have to sacrifice motherhood in order to be persons. Liberation was meant to expand womens opportunities, not to limit them. The self-esteem that has been found in new pursuits can also be found in mothering. Elaine HeffnerGod knows that a mother needs fortitude and courage and tolerance and flexibility and patience and firmness and nearly every other brave aspect of the human soul. But because I happen to be a parent of almost fiercely maternal nature, I praise  casualness. It seems to me the rarest of virtues. It is useful enough when children are small. It is useful to the point of necessity when they are adolescents. Phyllis McGinleyBiological possibility and desire are not the same as biological need. Women have childbearing equipment. For them to choose not to use the equipment is no more blocking what is instinctive than it is for a man who, muscles or no, chooses not to be a weightlifter. Betty Rollin If you bungle raising your children, I dont think whatever else you do well matters very much.   Jacqueline Kennedy OnassisI looked on child rearing not only as a work of love and duty but as a profession that was fully as interesting and challenging as any honorable profession in the world and one that demanded the best I could bring to it. Rose KennedyTime is the only comforter for the loss of a mother. Jane Welsh CarlyleA mother is not a person to lean on, but a person to make leaning unnecessary. Dorothy Canfield FisherShe was the archetypal selfless mother: living only for her children, sheltering them from the consequences of their actions and in the end doing them irreparable harm. Marcia MullerIf youve never been hated by your child, youve never been a parent. Bette DavisWomen who miscalculate are called mothers. Abigail Van BurenBeing a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs... since the payment is pure love. Mildred B. Vermont Death and taxes and childbirth! Theres never any convenient time for any of them! Margaret MitchellBeth could not reason upon or explain the faith that gave her courage and patience to give up life, and cheerfully wait for death. Like a confiding child, she asked no questions, but left everything to God and nature, Father and Mother of us all, feeling sure that they, and they only, could teach and strengthen heart and spirit for this life and the life to come.   Louisa May Alcott, in  Little Women, chapter 36Women knowThe way to rear up children (to be just)They know a simple, merry, tender knackOf tying sashes, fitting baby-shoesAnd stringing pretty words that make no sense. Elizabeth Barrett Browning,  Aurora LeighNever marry a man who hates his mother, because hell end up hating you. Jill BennettSpend at least one Mothers Day with your respective mothers before you decide on marriage. If a man gives his mother a gift certificate for a flu shot, dump him.   Erma Bombeck It is not until you become a mother than your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.   Erma BombeckCultural expectations shade and color the images that parents-to-be form. The baby product ads, showing a woman serenely holding her child, looking blissfully and mysteriously contented, or the television parents, wisely and humorously solving problems, influence parents-to-be. Ellen GalinskyThough motherhood is the most important of all the professions requiring more knowledge than any other department in human affairs there was no attention given to preparation for this office. -  Elizabeth Cady StantonNo one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed. I have known mothers who remake the bed after their children do it because theres a wrinkle in the spread or the blanket is on crooked. This is sick.   Erma BombeckMost of all the other beautiful things in life come by twos and threes by dozens and hundreds. Plenty of roses, stars, sunsets, rainbows, brothers, and sisters, aunts and cousins, but only one mother in the whole world. Kate Douglas Wiggin Becoming a mother makes you the mother of all children. From now on each wounded, abandoned, frightened child is yours. You live in the suffering mothers of every race and creed and weep with them. You long to comfort all who are desolate. Charlotte GrayMotherhood brings as much joy as ever, but it still brings boredom, exhaustion, and sorrow too. Nothing else ever will make you as happy or as sad, as proud or as tired, for nothing is quite as hard as helping a person develop his own individuality especially while you struggle to keep your own. Marguerite Kelly and Elia ParsonsGiving kids clothes and food is one of thing, but its much more important to teach them that other people besides themselves are important and that the best thing they can do with their lives is to use them in the service of other people. Dolores Huerta And from that prolific writer (possibly female!) who is called Unknown: All mothers are working mothers. UnknownA Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. Unknown